Wired for Success in Relationship

I was invited to speak at the RCCG Lagos Province 19 Annual Built to Last Conference on Saturday 28^th of November 2015 and it dawned on me that despite the drive for positive change in the national sphere, our relationships have continued to experience negative change.

Whether we believe it or not, a dearth of strong relationships, will ultimately affect our national drive for change. So how can we achieve change or success in our relationships - love, work, ministry etc.?

Consider this as you audit the year and plan for the year ahead...

HATE and LOVE are the key words. HATE leads to failure and LOVE leads to success.

Tips that can lead to failed relationship

H - Hurt; you need to heal from past hurts to position you to love again or love genuinely. If you were hurt at your last job, except you have a new mindset you may very well be hurt again at your new job because something has wired pain in you!

A - Anger; you must stop being angry with yourself, others, your situation, your parent, partner, boss etc. Fix what needs to be fixed and move up.

T - Temptations or trials; contentment the Bible say is great gain. Don't let the trials of life or lust of the eyes kill you. Coveting your boss' wife/husband or seat may be your undoing.

E - Envy or enemies; being envious of the person you are in a relationship with could lead to enmity and ultimately destroy the union. Learn to complement the person not compete with the person

Tips that can lead to successful relationship

L - Live; don't merely exist. Be yourself and bend genuinely where need be. If you prefer no make up and he prefers heavy make up, settle for something moderate and have his understanding. If she prefers corporate dressing and you prefer slacks settle for business casual.

O - Outstanding; the man/woman you are interested in has other suitors likewise the seat you have just been promoted to, so stand out. You can stand out with one shirt or one talent. Ask God to help you. David stood out amongst his brothers by being the nurturer and carer.

V - Vision; know your vision and share it. Money is not everything; many women would pick a man with a vision before the one that has a television. Vision will grow television would need a newer model soon!

E – Empathy i.e. the ability to understand and share the feelings of the other person would go a long way to cement the relationship or love between you. Be a friend not a fiend!

If this made sense to you, note that the abridged version of the ministration would be on www.dckiss.blogspot.com soon for a limited time. Subscribe and encourage others to subscribe to the site to enable you receive the 5 part document.

Dr. Omolola Omoteso-Famuyiwa is a minister who is passionate about sharing God's Word for the healing of souls.

Succeeding the Bible Way

Brethren, anyone can succeed. You don’t need to be saved to succeed. As humans, we are all wired for success, little wonder some tamper with that wiring to negatively redefine success e.g. Adolf Hitler and others like him. Bill Gates is a success but he doesn’t go to church. To kick-start your wiring for success, you need the principles I have shared. But to have good, righteous or enduring success, there is only one place to turn – God, and there is only one instance of “good success” in the KJV Bible. If you get it, you’ll get a copy of my book… Let’s open to Joshua 1:8, read with me if you have the KJV Bible:

This book of the law shall not depart out of thy mouth; but thou shalt meditate therein day and night, that thou mayest observe to do according to all that is written therein: for then thou shalt make thy way prosperous, and then thou shalt have good success.

Brethren, whatever strategy you adopt, if you want your success to be Christ-like, credible and constant, look to the Author and Finisher of your faith and to His Word – the Bible.

As I conclude, I want you to write down your own definition of success. Then write down your purpose or what you believe your calling in life is. To get married is not a purpose or calling, it is a desire, which could be a means to fulfil your calling. Remember, who you marry can make or mar your calling in life. Search the Word of God to discover your divine wiring for success. Genesis 1:27 say, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” Say, “I am created in God’s image.” God is synonymous with excellence and success so you are wired for success. It is not enough to believe it but you need to search for facts in the Bible and in your life that will establish such belief in you only then will nothing be able to edit out that fact. Say loudly, I am wired for success. I will wire success in me. By God, I will succeed.

I grew up being very timid. But after I overhead the school matron saying, “E wo omo ti won so wipe ko le se head girl o, that she is too small and timid, see all she has achieved as the health captain!” I made up my mind, that NOTHING will rob me of opportunities again. I went to join Man O’ War, I started climbing trees and looking people straight in the eyes so much so that I was nicknamed “small but mighty!” What you need to do, to come out of your own limiting factors or circumstances may be different but I want you to do this either tonight or before the end of this week: Write down everything that appears like limiting factors – I have k-leg, I stammer, I was born by poor parents, I was trained by my uncle who used me as house help, my parents are so rich that they pampered me and I can’t do anything by myself. Write everything down. Then tear it up, burn it or put it in an envelope and seal it until you succeed. As you minimise these limiting circumstances, you would move closer to your success. Finally, move from undermining to maximising the power of your potential (God given talents or acquired abilities), define or redefine your purpose, begin to exude passion about what you do, who you are and where you are going, determine to persevere and appreciate your positioning regardless role or status. I’ll explain, Joseph became a slave but he appreciated the fact that he was divinely positioned; instead of bemoaning his status he was thanking God for being alive and for being a slave in the palace. Instead of jumping at the rare amoral privilege of becoming the Queen’s gigolo, he opted to remain disciplined. When he found himself in prison, he ensured that prison was not found in him.

My definition of success is achieving or fulfilling God’s desire for my creation. By implication, my extended definition is “Joyfully creating an extraordinary life for myself, my family, those I love and those around me.” Brethren, the science of achievement is embedded in the ability to take your dream and ideas from mere illusion into reality. The art of achievement is fulfilment. Therefore, success is achievement with fulfilment. As a spiritual being, something will leap in you, when you succeed but never to a point where you let discontentment set it. Achievement without fulfilment is ultimate failure.

I will end with this story, Robin Williams the comedian, was a success. He wanted to make people laugh, host a television show, make movies, receive awards including an Oscar, have a beautiful family, he wanted to be loved by people and he achieve ALL. Not some but all. But sadly success was not wired in him and so for many years he suffered from periodic bouts of depression, which led to substance.

Dr. Omolola Omoteso-Famuyiwa is a minister who is passionate about sharing God's Word for the healing of souls.

Destiny Deflators

Part I is titled Wired for Success...

This leads us to the next part of this ministration – Destiny Deflators! Circuit Breakers! Your wiring for success may experience short circuit or outage because of destiny watchers or destiny killers. Destiny deflators or circuit breakers can interrupt the high current of your wiring for success.

Some of you are employed in places that may lead to success outage. A similar account is in Genesis 30:29-30. Here we see Jacob speaking to his employer, Laban, “And he said unto him, Thou knowest how I have served thee, and how thy cattle was with me. For it was little which thou hadst before I came, and it is now increased unto a multitude; and the Lord hath blessed thee since my coming: and now when shall I provide for mine own house also?” You cannot just sit and watch. By returning to the drawing table, I was able to get my employer to give me Thursdays off in addition to closing earlier on Tuesdays so I could attend Bible Study. Jacob threatened to quit before Laban confessed that his success was rooted in the grace upon Jacob’s life. Be careful of Destiny Devaluers! When the Holy Spirit prompts you, you may have to re-nogotiate the terms of service or exit the employment for the glory of your success to see the light of day.

Let’s look at Isaiah 6:1, what happened in the year King Uzziah died? Isaiah saw the Lord. Which means that if King Uzziah did not die, the possibility of Isaiah seeing the Lord may be slim or lost. What are the things, habits, issues and even people that need to go or die (temporarily or permanently) for you to fully maximise your wiring for success? Whoever is capable of truncating or short-circuiting your destiny MUST be kept at a distance. Some of them like Uzziah may need to die, others may need to be repelled or avoided to ensure your progress towards success is hidden from them. If keeping your distance does not work, you may have to spiritually break the evil transmitter attached to your success meter!

Herod would have truncated Moses’ destiny, Pharaoh may have truncated Joseph destiny, king Darius would have short circuited Daniel’s destiny and king of Babylon, Nebuchadnezzar, would have shortened the lives of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego if they had not remained fully plugged into God who wired them for success. It is because of negative controllers of destiny that we need biblical strategies and warfare prayers to succeed or excel in life.

The Bible say call upon me and I will (answer), ask and you will be (given), seek and you will (find), knock and the door will be (opened). There are biblical strategies without which you could remain stagnant even on the road to success. Your experience and your individual circumstance would determine how you would apply these strategies. If a lion is chasing you, you are not likely to get to the door of God’s mercy and begin to whisper, “Darling Jesus, could you open the door to my breakthrough?” Calling, asking, seeing and knocking are quite relative; your need will drive your approach!

There was a proverb in the days of old which reflects the fact that children born while on exile in Babylon continue to pay for the sins of their fathers which means, regardless of their destiny, because they were born into slavery, they were doomed for failure. Slavery was their short circuit; their destiny deflator while stagnancy was their circuit breaker. But God repealed that proverb by His grace for the benefit of his children. Jeremiah 31:29, “In those days they shall say no more: ‘The fathers have eaten sour grapes, And the children’s teeth are set on edge’.” Thank God for His grace!

Dr. Omolola Omoteso-Famuyiwa is a minister who is passionate about sharing God's Word for the healing of souls.

Wired for Success or Programmed for Failure

By design, all of God's creation is wired for success but circumstances, challenges or curses may re-programme even Christians for failure. Let's look at the lives of Bible people; all wired for success but some failed and others succeeded.

Bible People Who Failed 

5.     Samson

He was born wired for success. Clear divination, clarity of direction with a matching determination as he grew in grace. But he was not disciplined. Did he succeed? NO! His destiny was truncated due to lack of discipline. He died on the road called to success. One lesson that is apparent is that you can be wired for success and still programme yourself for failure. By not being disciplined, Solomon reprogrammed himself for failure. 

6.     Eve

The mother of creation! Wired for success but what became of her, lust of the eyes. She desired what she was told she couldn’t have. What has God clearly asked you to stay clear of but that is the very thing you want, you are reprogramming yourself for big time failure. Beware!

7.     Reuben

Genesis 49:3 started beautifully, “Reuben, thou art my firstborn, my might, and the beginning of my strength, the excellency of dignity, and the excellency of power…” How I wish it ended there, we would have used this verse to establish the role destiny and divine positioning plays in being wired for success. But it did not end there. In verse 4 we read, “Unstable as water, thou shalt not excel; because thou wentest up to thy father's bed; then defiledst thou it: he went up to my couch.” Though you are wired to be the strength of your father, Reuben, you shall not excel! What a sad proclamation by a father to a son. Culturally the firstborn has the best of inheritance and except in few instances where God deliberately chose the younger child, firstborns are positioned to lead. What led to his failure, indiscipline! He was not only into women; he made the error of choosing his father’s woman!

8.     Miriam

The daughter of God-fearing parents and Moses’ sister. Destiny positioned her for success such that she was the vessel that drove Moses into the royal adoption by the king’s daughter. Yet she questioned God and his decision to make Moses the redeemer. She like many of you may have been single yet she was called into the service of God as the first human to lead group worship in the Bible and was called into the office of a prophetess. At the Red Sea, we see Miriam standing out so prominently, proclaiming and singing the power and faithfulness of God. She, it was, who led the Israelite women in dancing and instrumental accompaniment as she sang the ode of praise and victory to God. But this woman who was a national leader in Israel failed because of personal jealousy, discontentment and the fear of losing grip as a leader, which made the name Miriam, bitterness, come true. Her case is a bitter one of being wired for success by destiny but programmed for failure by design! She died of a broken heart.

Bible People Who Succeeded

1.     Abigail

It would seem she was programmed for failure with a marriage to a foolish man but she must have been a wise woman who never forgot the fact that her success should not be affected by her earthly circumstance but can be strengthened by how she positions herself. Abigail tapped into her divine wiring to position herself for success.

2.     Samuel

Imagine the situation he found himself. Please as I am sharing these stories locate yourself in the relevant ones and begin to mentally picture how you can use these stories to turn around your own situation. Samuel was born by comfortable or rich parents. How do I know? The father had more than one wife. They went on annual pilgrimage which is today like going to Jerusalem or going on vacation annually, you have to be rich to do that plus he went with his entire family and they do lunch which means they hired an inn or something… Yet Samuel’s parents sent him to live with a prophet whose income is determined by what he is given. Priests and prophets in those days have no secular jobs unlike pastors today, they cannot earn any income, they are not permitted to even own lands just so they are not distracted; they live on the benevolence of or hand out from worshippers. To make matters worse, Eli’s children were ungodly so it was easy for Samuel to say, I can’t succeed because of my circumstance but did Samuel succeeded. Yes! Samuel is the only patriarch who had one wife and succeeded tremendously. Today, he is ranked as the greatest prophet that ever lived. He would have made mistakes along the way but he ALWAYS deferred to God. He never allowed a bloated ego of self or lack of discipline to ruin his wiring for success.

3.     Esther

A nobody orphan girl adopted by an older cousin. This cousin however set her on a path of destiny by taking her into his home and raising her as his own child. He taught her the fear of God, respect for authority and understanding of God’s will which positioned her to receive the innate blessing of beauty that surpassed that of other females. After making it into the palace as First Lady, it was so easy for her to gbagbe ile, that is forget her background and forget Mordecai her guardian and mentor. Many people fail today because they undermine their divine helpers. She could have sent word back to Mordecai, Ko jo! I am now the king’s wife so please don’t give me orders. I am now the VP’s wife so respect your self. Instead she went into prayer, fasting and committed herself in faith to act in line with God’s will and divine directions despite the capital risk involved. Esther did not let the dainties in the palace ruin her success.

4.     Cornelius

Cornelius’ character as a soldier who is ethical and has noble influence among Jews is unprecedented. Moreover, the centurion was a force in his family and he led them in spiritual values. Though not a lot is written about this man who attained success as a commander of a century in the ancient Roman army, he is depicted in the New Testament as a God-fearing man whose life is characterised by reverence, worship and devotion to God. He prayed consistently and was well known for being generous to the poor. His salvation came as an icing on the cake of his success as we know, it is more difficult for a rich person to attain salvation. Yet, God specifically, arranged Cornelius’ salvation via a vision instructing him to send the men of his household to Joppa where they will find Simon Peter who had earlier been instructed via a separate vision to share salvation with him. This divine experience embeds Cornelius’ name in history as the first gentile convert, who opened the door of faith to other gentiles.

Dr. Omolola Omoteso-Famuyiwa is a minister who is passionate about sharing God's Word for the healing of souls.