Why do people ask for photo of person they are to be introduced, referred or connected to. And why do some within 24 hours of beingintroduced, want to see photo and get so hung up on it?
Do you want to befriend a person or a photo? Can someone tell me what I don't know.
My take is that it is to JUDGE. BUT marriage is NOT about your judgement or your will but God's will. The more we understand that simple fact, the more we will quit spending a life time looking for who is fine.
We had a beauty in my high school. Females called her beautiful. One day, she had an accident on her way to school that left probably two family members dead and herself severely scarred on the face. I saw her in 2022 and I said to myself, no one would imagine today how beautiful she was then FACIALLY. As that thought crossed my mind another did, as she smiled and joked with her set members; her real beauty was never scarred, just her face; she remains a reflection of God.
I met Cobhams Asuquo some years ago while I was managing a gospel music band made up of 5 guys - 6team. Pleasant and skilled man who excelled as a music producer. He married across tribal lines to Ojuolape, a beauty in every sense. When she discovered after 4 months that her son was born visually impaired like her husband, her world may have sank but she joined her loving husband to embrace the challenge. She is living her best life and graduated in 2022 from MBA at the University of Southern California. Her marriage is a lever NOT limitation to destiny fulfilment.
When I met Cobhams Asuquo, he was not popular then but he had an aura of celebrity around him, I was in awe of his skills... He was head of Audio Productions at Questionmark Entertainment and I went to discuss recording for the band I managed. In 2005, Asuquo was signed on with Sony ATV London as a songwriter. He set up his own recording facility in 2006.
What am I saying? He is fulfilling destiny beyond the limits of blindness. His being born blind cannot be traced to anything and now he has a son who is blind. If a woman in his life is to fight anything, it is to prayerfully discover the root of the blindness and stop it from continuing while remaining eyes to her husband and son. Her second son has no visual impairment.
Many today can see with their physical eyes but their spiritual eyes are dead. This is why you would reject someone who has a glorious destiny because of what the world call disability.
In DC, as part of our policies, we do NOT share image when we are introducing, referring or connecting. In fact we used to share more information than we do now. Now we give you a code with 2 alphabets, gender and mention circumstance - never married, divorced, widowed and we add with or without child/ren; we never tell you whether the children are biological or adopted; omo babies tabi aibi kii se aarun - having or not having child is NOT a disease or disability. That someone had before does not mean the person will have with you, not having before is not a gate to having now. Trust God with your needs.
If you have gone to pray ahead of choosing one of the options we send you, 2-3, please do NOT close the friendship in 7 days. Do NOT lie that you prayed and when you see photo or hear this and that you say it is no longer God. That is dishonest.
Know that IF you are NOT a member who received counsel, whoever we are referring or introducing you to is for FRIENDSHIP. For those who have received counsel, your connection (step higher than referral or introduction) is for relationship but you still need to be friends and work your way in or up. The friendship or relationship can evolve with your commitment and consistent involvement.
When you develop likeness for a woman or man, you will look beyond photo into the possibilities of the union.
I was never sent my husband's photo before we met in person... When I saw his image online, his eyeballs immediately told me there is a medical issue. Having being Health Captain in high school, I learned a lot by working in the dispensary. When I met him, he was in a state of depression; his yellow tshirt was worn out and frayed at the neck. If I was told then, I would not have believed that he owned the house we met in, in the USA. Instead of seeing problems, I saw POSSIBILITIES.
When I discovered he had a rare blood condition and I wanted to end the relationship because neither him nor the 'connector' told me, God said but I who asked you to go ahead knew. I stepped in and God stepped up to help me.
That a man or woman is fine on display photo does not mean that level of fine is the now level or even a level acceptable to you. If I take an image at an alumni or wedding dinner, don't expect that image when you run into me in danfo bus!
I was severely put off by a man who spent weeks telling me I am God's will for him but when he set eyes on me, he immediately began to complain about my reduced weight. He said I am NOT the woman he saw in an image he likes. This simply means I am your desire NOT God's design for you! So why spend weeks convincing me God said you are my wife. Unknown to him, I lost weight while battling injury inflicted on me in a love relationship.
An image could be a turn off depending on mood or outside influence because some will promptly send such image to pastor or family friends who will begin to judge. Some will even take such image or photo to "altars" or give to parents or others to take to altars in the name of inquiring. I remember a sister getting excited about a suitor's image and giving her blessings without taking time to check through the Holy Spirit whether this man is for right or not. I take that blame as well because I leaned into God's permissive will, NOT his perfect will.
Many today, even those who may be out of shape or pot bellied want fine folks or fall in love with the idea of marrying FINE but the right person can create the right personality for self or you. When my Dad used to buy my glasses, it was as if the capacity to see is doubled by size! Once I could buy them myself, I went for small and simple. When I could afford designers, I used D&G - stylish and trendy.
Was Mrs. Stella Obasanjo NOT beautiful? A roadside hairdresser in Egbaland, elevated by marriage to the status of First Lady of the most populous and most powerful country in Africa. When she started secret affair with him she never imagined this rugged soldier would impact her life positively. Her 60th was approaching and she decided to go abroad to do tummy tuck. She never returned alive!
Please trust God with your journey to marital ease, peace and bliss. The person we introduce could become your destiny mate, lead you to your destiny mate or be a life long buffer.
Embrace Possibilities!
Dr. Omolola Omoteso-Famuyiwa is a minister who is passionate about sharing God's words
for the healing of others.
