I’m graced to have been invited to share a
message with this esteemed group Living By Design Nation. I acknowledge all
leaders and pastors here present. I acknowledge my dear sister and friend, Mrs.
Pearl Kanu. As rightly said, I am Omolola Omoteso, the doctorate I earned is in
Biblical Counselling. I always let people know that in spite of the wealth of
knowledge and experience I have garnered in 48 years, I owe the care and
counsel that I share to Lord God Almighty, the giver of life and owner of
wisdom who continues to heal lives through me. I trust that at the end of my
message, we would have received healing to sign up for gratitude while working
in true love, God’s love.
Let us pray.
Praise:
Love lifted me
And I say Love lifted me
When nothing else could help
Love lifted me 2/ce
Prayer:
God of Love in whom there is no variableness, we thank you
for being good and we thank you for being God. We thank you for your sanity,
your security, your safety. We thank you for this body of Jesus Christ one you
love by design. Let the words I deliver be soaked in your power to save,
deliver and heal to God’s glory, in Jesus majestic name we pray. AMEN.
Gratitude While Working in
Love /ˈɡradəˌt(y)o͞od/
2020 has earned the tag of
the year we planned but God decided. Challenges abound, crisis followed, pain
was unleashed as many experienced loses, yet pain turned to praise for many
more and we were enjoined to worship. I acknowledge all those who have lost
loved ones. I give gratitude to God who blessed us with your loved ones. Our
loved ones are gifts that keep giving. If someone paid your school fees, the
person remains part of who you are. Christianity is faith that was bought with
blood, not only the blood of Jesus Christ but the blood of disciples and saints
who built the body of Jesus Christ and gave their all to hold the body
together.
You can elect to make
gratitude a lifestyle and you can choose to go through life complaining about
everything wrong that has happened to you. While at it, remember that the
breath with which you have chosen to lament was and remains a gift, if for
nothing else, be grateful or ask the owner of the gift to take it. In the
parable of the talents, one buried his gifts rather than multiply it as a way
of showing gratitude.
One thing covid has
brought to the fore is focus on what is important. What is important?
1.
Faith – This means your relationship with God
2.
Food – If you don’t grow it yourself, you need to show gratitude
3. Family – No one on this call, dropped from heaven, whether parents
are living or dead, our presence is a gift – you are a gift for which I am
grateful.
4. Fellowship – This group and all the eminent persons here present
is why I am here, I owe gratitude to God for you. If I got all the degrees and
have no outlet, soon I would be like a pond – stink and die without giving
life!
5. Fence – That is shelter. I went to great length to furnish our
home; my husband would always talk about being grateful that we have roof over
our head in a great location. When I became homeless, I knew the value of
shelter, furnished or unfurnished!
6.
Friends – Some commit suicide because they feel so alone and so
unwanted. We knew the value of friends when no matter how rich you are folks
chose not to visit for fear of covid. In fact, those who used to pose with
going abroad became ostracised!
7.
Folks – These are those who make your life run smoothly, your
driver, your cook, the shop owners, security, electrician. Just imagine for a
moment that transformer blew and no one is ready to come to your home to fix a
temporary power source. At the thick of covid, post officers were still
delivering mails and sellers still got goods to you and yours. Should we be
grateful? Yes.
Gratitude is a SEED. A seed that yields increase especially when you sow selflessly.
John 15:5 says I am the
vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same
bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing. As spirit beings,
we cannot function without God. We are spirit beings... Jesus gave, we are
called to give and one thing that technically cost nothing is the ATTITUDE of
GRATITUDE.
The role of Holy Spirit in
Christianity is dynamic. The Holy Spirit enables Christians to live a righteous
and faithful life. Holy Spirit is the comforter, the intercessor, the advocate
who pleads our cause especially during trials and temptations. I used to think
humans were created to be naturally kind but MOTHER schooled me that it takes a
heart of God to be kind. I had a friend who lived with me and she never could
give. She was living with me free but giving or gratitude was an issue. When I
heard she was divorced, my surprise was that God held the marriage for so long!
You cannot be walking or working without giving and GRATITUDE is the cheapest.
There are 7 gifts of the
Holy Spirit:
1.
Wisdom
2.
Understanding (empathy)
3.
Counsel
4.
Fortitude (courage in pain and adversity)
5.
Knowledge
6.
Piety (devotion/respect)
7.
Fear of God (reverence)
You cannot possess the 7
and lack a heart of gratitude. Humans were birthed in sin. The sense of shame
kicked Adam and Eve off the Garden of Grace. But Jesus provided propitiation
through the Comforter. The Holy Spirit guides us out of sin and helps us to be
HOLY. Without holiness no man can see God. Pastor Adeboye added that without
faith no man can please God.
Gratitude while working in
love does not mean absence of conflict… All Scripture is given by inspiration
of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for
instruction in righteousness (in holiness). Why? So that the servant of God may
be thoroughly equipped for every good work! Is that in your 2nd Timothy
3:16-17.
So gratitude is NOT
contingent upon your never being rebuked or reproofed! In Yoruba culture it is
the child who is loved that is corrected. The one who is unloved is left to
pride to kill.
What is gratitude? grat·i·tude
/ˈɡradəˌt(y)o͞od/?
It is the quality of being
thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
What is love? Love is a
verbial language from a heart of gratitude. It can also be defined as an
intense feeling of deep affection or a great interest and pleasure in
something.
What is while? While away
means waste but while signifies a period of time or during a period.
How do you grow the heart
or attitude of gratitude while working (ise) in love?
Let me clarify that it is
hard to work together without walking together and the Bible says in Amos 3:3
Can two walk together, except they be agreed?
Before we talk about gratitude, how can you work in love... How can you love as God loves to move forward the work of God or your calling to serve as His hands and feet? Before I go into narrative, we need to understand key points as it relates to working in a team…
1.
Purpose
2. Understanding
3.
Reach Out
4. Pray
5. Openness -
6. Spirituality
7. Excellence
I just shared with you 7
acronyms that translates to PURPOSE. As Myles Monroe said, if
purpose is unknown abuse is inevitable.
Everything we see today
will go, including the people on this platform. Life has they knew it in 1800
is not what we are experiencing today. Yes, we keep praying that we would live
long but God is sovereign and decides who should remain in service here or who
should return into heavenly worship and warmth. The only three things we have…
1. Trinity
2. Team
3. Time
Why is GRATITUDE important?
1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, In all things give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus
concerning you all.
It is God's will for us to be THANKFUL. It is God's will for God's creation to show GRATITUDE. And what better example do we have other than Jesus Christ.
Jesus was compassionate. Jesus did not just speak about love but
showed love through the capital price He paid at the Cross. If we are His
bruised hands and broken feet, we must do the same - You are going for a 3hour
meeting and know you would be hungry, why not take a snack that can be shared.
You see a brother who is comfortable but dress shabby, why not reach him to
share dressing ideas. He just may never have learned the art of looking good. A
sister’s make up is always off, rather than join others to gossip about her,
why not plan a makeup session just so she can learn without you being
condescending. Be reminded of James 2:15–17
15 If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily
food, 16 and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed
and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is
that? 17 So also faith by itself, if it does not have works,
is dead.
Love is making room in
your life, your 24 hours for someone else. Love is showing consideration. A
friend just went through a bitter divorce and her 50th was
coming up. She felt a sense of shame and did not want to celebrate. I
redirected her mind to the fact that she has many reasons to be thankful – the
man did not kill her, she did not kill the man, her son is emotionally
balanced, despite the emotional abuse she went through in the marriage, her
work has progressed, and she actually started a growing business to sustain
herself. Though she was on a loan with the loan scheme I started, I went out of
my way to show her that I was thankful for her life. Divorce does not make you
bad, it means two adults could not agree on letting God guide their union. I
gave the gift of small chops for the praise session and birthday flyers. Her spirit
has been on the high since then because she ended up having the bestest party
ever!
I mentioned that GRATITUDE is a SEED; add, a seed that yields unimaginable increase especially when you sow selflessly. And a gift that positions you and your issue to be prioritised.
Let's look at the Shunammite woman's story in 2 King's 4:8-37, wealthy, influential, highly connected. research tells me this woman from Shunem was referred to as "ishah gedolah" which means great woman. This could infer that she is wealthy or that she is wise. I strongly believe she possessed both especially when neither her wealth nor her loss got to her head; she remained humble, proactive and welcoming. She was so wealthy that she could build an adjoining home to accommodate Prophet Elisha who only visited few times a year. I have a sister who dedicated a room to me in her home, in appreciation of the role I played in her life. She is not as wealthy hence others use the room too but when I am coming, the home is cleaned, cleared and every other person who comes at that time becomes second priority. I can imagine that if she is as rich as the Great Woman from Shunem she would build a bungalow tagged, Dr. Omolola's Lodge! I remember my friend Leader Pearl Kanu saying to me, you have a room in my home. It was a measure of gratitude.
Let me state here that the decision not to worship God or honour men or women of God would change nothing, if nothing else it could reduce your opportunity to receive divine rewards.
Life would be meaningless
without love, kindness or gratitude especially in churches and church groups. Everyone may not have
the luxury of being loved intensely by a man, woman or even child. Why? It
takes two. But when people walk into your group or unit, it is the presence of
love and gratitude they see as you work together that would make them sign up.
It is the love of God expressed by humans that makes life meaningful.
When I was homeless. The sister who heard about it first was quite close to me but rather than reach out to help she gossiped about it to someone else but that was the end of the gossip. Why? Compassion drove that sister to have empathy and she decided, NO! Dr. Omolola cannot be on the street. It was her way of showing gratitude for my friendship and counsel. She could have taken me into her home but she did what she was led to do and what she did put God in a position to take me up after the hotel stay expired. If someone invites you to their home, they will find it hard to kick you out when you find no alternative…
Gratitude is a lifestyle, not merely saying thank you or I am grateful. In traditional churches, those getting married would take a warmer of meal and drinks to the pastors and choir members. Why, they were so busy and seldom attended. It was done willingly. Today it is so mandated that some elect not to marry because gratitude is at a cost...
A report in the Harvard Mental health Letter states: ‘A study of couples found that individuals who took time to express gratitude for their partner not only felt more positive toward the other person but also felt more comfortable expressing concerns about their relationship.’ Research also shows that generosity and gratitude work hand in hand with benefits for the giver and receiver. Expressing gratitude is linked to the release of oxytocin, called the ‘love hormone’, which is perhaps why a study shows that participants giving and receiving thanks felt more loving and caring towards their partner.
Gratitude is
a way of life that goes beyond thank you and everyone can develop the
attitude. Yorubas say eniti o bam o inu ro, a moo pe du. Meaning, if you know
how to think, you will know how to thank.
Why do some appear ungrateful?
Humans are wired for connection, but trauma rewires humans for protection, hence many feel those who go out of their way to show gratitude are doing it for a reason hence they withhold thanks and are on their toes, watching out for when the person would place a demand on them.
We all must learn to show gratitude for small and/or big things.
Some only
show gratitude to those who are able to pay back, that is NOT gratitude, that
is investment which may or may not yield returns. I used to serve as a nursing
aide to an elderly woman whose family was rich, I had high hopes as a teenager.
When she transited, I was NOT given any special recognition. From then, I
learned that service is to the Ultimate Boss. The title of a book I co-authored
with a man with about 25 years’ experience with the UN is Employees from
Heaven, that is one book every worker, every employee, every pastor,
parishioner and every politician should read. Your gratitude like your work or
service is ultimately to God.
With a
doctorate degree, I recently had to work with a 10 year old girl with learning
disability for 9 months, I approached my work like I was being paid as a doctorate
degree holder. To anyone trusting God for a job – dress for your next job, for
anyone trusting God to be elevated or to be married, dress for your next
calling. Approach your assignment in LBD with every excellence God has blessed
you with because it is while doing so you will be divinely connected.
I met my
sister Mrs. Pearl Kanu because she stood out in a social political group. When
she left, it was a case of reckless love, I left the 99 and went after her; you
cannot leave! Why? She was serving excellently, and God never told me she was
done. My insistence that she returns was an act of gratitude for her service.
Some would leave and folks would say, good riddance!
Show kindness effortlessly… You look tired, may I help you with your shopping over the weekend. Make kind comments, instead of focusing on the bent shoe, comment on the well-manicured fingers. For those who are married, no matter what else you want God to fix in your spouse’s life, because you are NOT perfect, focus on the beautiful things and celebrate that. Leave the perfect God to fix what you cannot fix.
The Bible says a man’s gifts will make a way
not because people are waiting to be bribed but because when you give, you
stand in the place of Jesus Christ and your brother or sister sees Christ
through you.
Write it down – what are you grateful for. Post it in the chat box… reach out to tell the person. It could be to someone or about something in LBD, post something – this is therapy. Get that gratitude off your chest.
Gratitude is an expression of unconditional
LOVE whose author and finisher is God. Unconditional LOVE is a creative
lifegiving energy. It has been scientifically proven that those who are in
loving relationships have better chance of surviving sickness and stressful
events in their lives. We can show love by expressing appreciation and gratitude.
What is one thing you are deeply grateful for: a child in your life, or the beauty of nature? A member of LBD or a staff in your office? A neighbour or a family member? One thing about gratitude is that you can never use it up!
Gratitude
enhances relationships because it makes people feel loved, appreciated and by
implication happier. It shows you place value on people, presence and present.
Never take your tribe members for granted, they can choose to be anywhere but
the group. Show gratitude to family members, never feel entitled. That a man
signed dotted lines on paper does not make him bound. What ties him to you is a
sense of responsibility that can be fuelled by gratitude. That a member signed
for membership does not mean enslavement, it is devotion to God that positions
them to serve; fuel that with warmth and positive energy by showing gratitude.
I thank God for you and end with Numbers 6:24-26 (NKJV), The Lord bless you and keep you; The Lord make His face shine upon you, And be gracious to you; The Lord lift up His countenance upon you, And give you peace. AMEN.
Question:
How do you respond to those who are ungrateful?
Response:
No one is created to be ungrateful. Everyone born of God has God in their heart and having God means they have the character of gratitude which may have been turned off but can be turned on as we express gratitude even for the little they do. Jesus gave thanks over 5 loaves and 2 fish, it was after giving thanks that the gift multiplied. I urge you to give thanks for even the little the member does. The attitude of ingratitude is driven by events and experiences in the lives of those we tag ungrateful. I mentioned those who have faced loses may not be emotive… remember, they may have prayed, they fasted when their loved ones were sick, they showed gratitude in worship and gave offering, but God in His sovereignty still welcomed the soul of their beloved to heaven! They may not necessarily become emotionless, but they become expressionless. Those wired for protection due to trauma may also appear ungrateful. An abuse, a life draining event or a crisis, could knock gratitude out of anyone. So, I urge you, be Jesus’ hands and feet, learn to know them better and keep showing gratitude. Add gratitude to your policy, teach it as LDB culture and express it as Christians. This will help those in need of help develop the attitude, act, art, and heart of gratitude as Christians.
